Sep 28

I choose home

I have just returned, to the place I call home, SOUTH AFRICA after living in a van and traveling halfway around Australia alone.

It was absolutely liberating. I learnt things that far surpassed my expectations and met beautiful strangers who taught me some of life’s craziest lessons.

It’s been a strange feeling coming home. People always look at me with a subdued sense of shame in their eyes.

“ Aghhh Shame man, why did you come home?” I’m constantly, surprised by their response.

But now I have got used to it, as after about the 20th time, I realised that this is how majority of people think.

People wondering why on earth would I choose to come back to South Africa? To this ‘ failing’ country as most of them put it, this place with no future.

And every time my response is the same and said with GEES and straight from the heart.


To my country, to my people, my family. To the land that I was born in. Because this is where my heart resides.

I think traveling and gaining perspective is one of the most crucial things that we can do in our lives.

I lived in what some may call, the best and safest country in the world. The beautiful Australia.

Don’t get me wrong, this is evidently one of the most incredible countries. Magical landscapes, good people, safe and a wonderful lifestyle.

Australia is also one of the most racially segregated countries, with very little integration.

I felt deeply disconnected to people and I consider myself to be an extremely friendly person, who goes out of their way to feel connected.

Don’t get me wrong, Australia is lovely but nothing like HOME.

And I really did give it a chance, I lived in a van and saw nearly half of it and I loved every bit of it.

Australia changed me.

Changed me for the better. And I thank you beautiful Australia.

I realised that where I come is pretty darn crazy, beautiful.

It has been quite saddening for me to see how many South Africans have become so negative.

It is programmed within the human mind, to always think negatively, to always think the worst. It is the natural reaction of the human condition.

If we want to change this, we have to make a conscious choice everyday, to choose to see a different reality.

This takes work.

Your outer reality, mirrors your inner reality. So in order to see a beautiful world, you need to become beautiful on the inside.

In order to see a more peaceful world, we need to become peaceful on the inside.

If you would like to see a happy world, you need to go inwards and connect to your inner happiness.

I couldn’t be prouder to home. I know that our current situation is volatile. I get that. But when in the history of the world has there not been volatility?

There will always be bad times. There always have and there always will.

We need to begin to understand that this is how the world is created.

Dark, Light. Yin, Yang. Love, fear. Peace.War.

This is what makes us whole. We cannot have light, if the dark did not exist. We cannot know peace if we do not know what war is.

It is called polarity. The one cannot exist without the other.

We as humans are made up of the exact same energies. There are many different aspects to ourselves and one of that is opposites energy. Masculine, Feminine.

These two polarities, balance one another but they can become unbalanced and therefore there is an imbalance in the energy. And this is how chaos is caused. And it all begins with the imbalance within ourselves.

This is the basic law of the universe. Once we have made peace with this fact, we can begin to see the world through different lenses.

I have never felt more inspired on a daily basis. Volatility breeds resilience. There is a strength and spirit within South Africans that I have never seen anywhere else in the world.

Everyday I am having conversations with friends. Starting businesses, creating NGO’s, starting conversations and really ‘ doing the work’.

Then there are those who continue to be nay-sayers, haters, pessimists. And I want to ask you from my heart…

How’s that going for you?

Is your world and reality a happy one?

A peaceful one?

Are you experiencing all the joy and love the world has to offer?

What you believe about yourself and the world, is essentially what is going to become your truth.

So if you believe the world is filled with suffering and pain, this is what will be projected back at you.

I am completely aware about the state of our country and not pretending to be naive. But sometimes we allow ourselves to get so caught up in our external environment because we are to afraid to do our own work.

So we project all our fears and worries onto the world around us and the world then becomes a very dark and scary place.

When we choose to ‘ do the work’ and face ourselves, the world becomes a very different place.

If you want world peace, find peace within yourself.

If you want to find love, become love.

If you want to feel accepted, accept yourself.

I see a very different South Africa, I see a country of opportunity, of change, we are the CENTRE OF THE EARTH. We have a spirit like no other.

We are warriors, we are fighters, we are resilient. We make ourselves heard. We make our mark on this world.

There is no one on this planet, quite like a South African, we really are so unique and special.

I use to run down the streets of Sydney and wave at passers by. One morning I crashed to my knees and cried. I wept, I wept because I felt so disconnected. I felt alone.

No one returned my hello.

I now run down the streets, early hours of the morning and I am greeted on a daily basis with big smiles and open hearts.

Once again I am torn to my knees, with tears streaming down my face but this time for a different reason.

This time I shed tears of joy, for I have come home.

To the big South African smiles, our open hearts, our multicultural country, a country with people who have heritage and you may not see it, but I see it. THERE IS CHANGE HAPPENING.

We need to go to our darkest places to bring things to the light. What is happening now is that we are bringing the imbalances to the surface. We cannot shift or change that which we are no aware of.

I CHOSE HOME. My people, My family, My home, My South Africa.

I use to say that I felt that Australian’s hearts where closed. I have this belief that because of everything that we have been through as a country, it cannot somehow have a deep impact on every one of our hearts.

Our hearts have been broken. By the pain, by the suffering and the grief. Each and every one of us have been affected.


Sometimes our hearts need to crack, so we can let the light in.

I chose home and I will choose home every time.

I came back because I believe in our country, our people. I also know that the world is a challenging place to live in right now and things are happening all over the world.

So I ask of you one thing. Next time you feel like being negative about this country, please look at your own life and ask yourself how you are doing within yourself? What is your reality?

I choose to see a world of hope, love and compassion.

To put myself in others shoes and to have empathy, to open my heart and feel what others are feeling.

To choose everyday to be a better person, more loving, more giving, more sharing of myself.

Because I know when I can impact just one person with a smile, a gesture or a little bit of positivity, I know that there will be a knock on effect that we will all begin to shift and this country will become a better place.

I chose home. And I am here to create change, help as many people as I can on a daily basis. And realise that we are all in this together and I choose to see that….

I want to be apart of this transformation, this is where I was born and I believe that no matter what happens, where I travel too, I will always come home.

I won’t run away, because believe me. The grass is not always greener on the other side.

Happiness and peace is a state of mind.

Your stuff will always follow you, no mater where you go and live in the world. There will always be chaos. The chaos is within us. It’s apart of us.

It’s how we choose to see it.

It’s a choice we need to make everyday.

And I have made my choice…
I choose home.
I choose South Africa.
And it’s goddam beautiful to be home.

I will always be a traveler, a gypsy by heart but my heart will always live here, I will always hold my home in my heart.

Source: Lifetrain Blog